Whenever you take on a new role,
project, or a new team – you won’t have mastered the new work on day
one. You’re at the base of a learning curve. And walking your way up
will include some stumbling. But, it’s not the stumbling that makes
you uncomfortable.
Stumbling and bumbling doesn’t have to
feel uncomfortable. In fact, it can be very satisfying. Your
interpretation of it is what counts.
When I rolled over onto the hardwood
floor and bruised my hipbone – I took that as a sign of progress. I
was that much closer to being a cowboy.
What makes being uncomfortable
satisfying?
When you recognize that the discomfort
is taking you closer to your goal. When you understand that the
discomfort is the signal indicating that your neurology working
intensely to build new patterns of expertise. Then, you’ll gladly
lean into your discomfort.
You’ll seek out experiences and
opportunities where you can lean into your discomfort. Not simply to
feel the hardwood rubbing against your ribs. But, because you want
to grow, learn, and develop. The opportunities abound.
Think about a conversation or a
meeting that you know you’re going to have in the next three days.
Pick one that is important. That will take both courage and skill on
your part if it is to go well. Then, let yourself sense the emotions
that start swirling in your body.
Bringing the situation to mind –
really picturing it and feeling it – will activate your nervous
system. Even if the intensity seems to be less than when you’re in
the “real” situation, the neural pattern is the same. Your neurology
doesn’t distinguish between being in that meeting and thinking about
it. The same neurological patterns are stimulated whether you’re
having the person-to-person encounter or imagining it.
This is good news!! You can start to
lean into your discomfort before you walk through the door. You can
begin to change your experience – your neurology – before you’re in
the meeting. You can begin to develop new and more creative
responses – in the privacy of your own brain. You do this through
your imagination.
Explore, in your creative imagination,
what it would look like for you to show up in that meeting with just
a bit more courage.
Consider what would be a worthwhile
risk to take. In your mind’s eye picture what it would look like.
What you would do. Mentally, push yourself just a bit. Lean into
your discomfort and let your nervous system experience a new way of
being in that situation.
Remember, practicing this new way
mentally builds actual neural pathways that support new ways of
behaving and interacting.
You can do this in 60 seconds.
A few times a day. Just lean into your
discomfort – in the privacy of your own mind. Allow the natural
impulse of your brain to organize at greater and greater levels of
complexity and integration – to do the work.
By intentionally and mindfully leaning
into your discomfort, you stimulate your brain in ways that develop
greater flexibility and open avenues for greater behavioral choice.
Then, try it in the meeting.
Remember, the idea is to lean into
your discomfort, not to radically transform yourself overnight.
Learning doesn’t happen that way. You build mastery incrementally.
By leaning into your discomfort not by leaping over it.
I’m still not a full-fledged cowboy,
after all.
Thanks for reading
Eric
